All the news that isn't news, except trolls think it's news
The people of Bleatington never grew tired. They whined and cried all day but made sure to console each other by stating… Elsewhere… On a farm a man went to collect his daily dose of knowledge from his informative and helpful golden chickens. When he went to the coup they were nowhere to be found……
Here are a few of my faves: Bags of mostly water search to find my definition What are your favorite one hit wonders?
In a far away place lived a happy kingdom with beautiful land, people, unicorns and shit. The people would play music and dance all day! Then one day a troll came in. A big nasty one that called himself Micromind. He would eat children and brag to all about how he had a special way…
I’d rather do my nails, break them off, and redo them than have any association with this douche I would rather eat pine needles and listen to shakira’s “hips don’t lie“ on repeat for a whole day than have to read another lame ass, comment of this 3 time clogged artery fuck… I would rather…
Miraculously, the Reverend Oral Subconscious resurrected himself in several new forms and insisted it was the work of The Lord! You’d think that The Lord could spell and make some damn sense, but apparently not. In fact, the Reverend’s Sockpuppet Army, as they have become known, constantly participates in circle jerks in front of children…
Grandma Moses learns that Chevy, the pig that she thought she ate, is actually alive when she sees it on a local news program. Outrageously enough, a local farmer has decided to put it up for election for a seat on the local town council. “I figger since an orange pig can run for President,…
Yep, the dregs of Disqus are still dredging the depths of decency. Here we have No-Knees Mahony, racisting as only he can: Stop me if you’ve heard this one: A “plantationist, an oriental, a gay man, and two house negroes” walked into a bar. They all beat the shit out of MC because he’s a…
And it’s either the dumbest or the most brilliant movie I’ve seen in quite a while. Possibly both. A lonely woman (Marianne Jean-Baptiste), recently separated from her husband, visits a bewitching London department store in search of a dress that will transform her life. She’s fitted with a perfectly flattering, artery-red gown—which, in time, will…
The Reverend Oral Subconscious never returned from his proselytizing trip with Grandma Moses. Granny was found wandering aimlessly from motel parking lot to motel parking lot, still looking for “pets”. The VW microbus was found in front of the Pink Pussy Nightclub, empty except for some pamphlets and used tissues. There was also a note…
As I’m sure you (don’t) remember, last time Tex bit off part of The Reverend’s nose in a fit of pique. Now The Reverend has no nose! How does he smell? AWFUL! Anyway, that incident drove The ol’ Rev over the edge. He broke Grandma Moses out of the asylum, took all of his savings,…
See previous post also: https://www.asthedisqturns.com/post/i-have-no-idea-what-to-title-this-post
And now… As you know (because you had better have been following the As the Disq Turns saga up until now, you jerks), the Reverend Oral Subconscious was sad and lonely because the only people who would listen to his sermons were some IQ-challenged folks, Secret Agent 2 and his girlfriend Dandelion, who he met…
