The Great & Powerful Coccyx’s 2021 Predictions

I have looked into my crystal G6 ball and hereby decree that the following will happen in 2021:

An orange idiot shall be ejected from office, will throw a tantrum about home decor, and will be found dead by erotic asphyxiation, holding a picture of Mitch McConnell

Squirrels will be mechanized into soldiers.

28 days after the first person catches the 5th mutant strain of COVID, Will Smith’s career will come alive again

Franz Kafka’s “The Trial” will be made into an animated feature by Netflix, voiced by David Hasselhoff

5G will herald in the new era of lizard alien overlords

Some white person will be an asshole to some stranger for no reason and get hit in the face with an as yet unknown object

Internet trolls will continue to bitch, moan, cry, and be unable to spell properly. However, they will finally be able to find love on the internet by taking this guy up on his offer:

Our resident attention whore will continue to attention whore while doxxing herself.


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