As the Disq Turns

Day: October 20, 2019

  • Coccyx’s Sunday Sermon

    Coccyx’s Sunday Sermon

    This week’s topic: Absolution

    ab·so·lu·tion /ˌabsəˈl(y)o͞oSH(ə)n/ noun formal release from guilt, obligation, or punishment.

    My dear friends, trolls, and inexplicable hangers-on,

    I am here today to speak to you about absolution.

    Yea, I’m talking about forgiveness for former Disqus sins, which I’ve probably forgotten the particulars of at this point or didn’t really give a fuck about beyond the point of “wow, this person’s a complete and utter idiot/asshole/psychopath – ban it, forget it exists, move the fuck on.” Well. unless you’re still keeping up your racist, sexist, attention whore-ist, generic moron-ist ways.

    No matter how drunkenly and incoherently you randomly ask for absolution in the night for yourself or your buddies in the middle of completely unrelated conversations, I cannot and will not grant it. Especially when you’re obviously drunk. And it’s in the middle of a completely unrelated conversation. Not that I would anyway, BUT COME THE FUCK ON. WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT SHIT? I must be mellowing in my old age because DAMN, I would have banned someone for that nonsense in the olden days.

    So, my children, release yourself from your own burdens or just shut the fuck up. Your issues are not my problem.

  • The Dregs of Disqus Roundup – Alternate Reality Edition

    The Dregs of Disqus Roundup – Alternate Reality Edition

    Meanwhile, in some alternate reality…

    Mahatmashitbag presents (to himself, apparently) an alternate history of Disqus, rife with leftist conspiracies!

    Then, some gumby* attempts to rewrite the bit about how shitbag’s myriad of socks were spammed — PROTIP: It was solely because he’s a spammer who tagged people incessantly and HAD A SHITLOAD OF SOCK ACCOUNTS:

    Not this kind, to be clear:

    Oh, and by the way, PUD is short for PUDENDUM. Hope that helps!

    Then, we have the most aptly self-named commenter, chillin’ in her own backwoods shed of conspiracy and crazy ass meth fever dreams:

    Wut?

    Wut part 2?

    (By the way, Granny, thanks for being the 3rd most prolific ATDT site visitor even though you pretend you never come over here! Your hits make me the big $$$$!

    I must have missed the part where any Disqus employee made any of my channels popular. Nice try, though! XD)

    And finally, we have the Queen of Denial

    …still pretending she didn’t help her boyfriend dox pretty much everyone on her shitty blogs. You can pretend that never happened all you like, you piece of shit, but that’s not reality.

    Signing off from the alternate Disqus universe!